Life and Toilet Paper
__________
I've
learned...that life is like a roll of toilet paper.
The closer it gets to the end, the faster it goes.
By, Notso Funny
____________
____________
____________
___________
__________
What's dumb?
Directions
on toilet paper.
What's dumber than that?
Reading them.
Even Dumber?
Reading them and learning something.
Dumbest of all?
Reading them and having to correct something that
you've been doing wrong.
__________
__________
tax day
__________
__________
__________
__________
__________
__________
__________
__________
__________
__________
__________
__________
__________
__________
__________
______
 
History
Before paper was widely available, a
variety of materials were employed. The Romans used an
L-shaped stick (like a hockey stick) made of wood or precious
metal; at public toilets people used sponges on sticks that
were kept in saltwater between uses. In arid climates, sand,
powdered brick, or earth was used. Until the late nineteenth
century, Muslims were advised to use three stones to clean up.
One favorite tool was a mussel shell, used for centuries.
Until the early twentieth century, corn cobs were used.
In the late fifteenth century, when
paper became widely available, it began to replace other
traditional materials. Sometimes old correspondence was
pressed into service, as were pages from old books, magazines,
newspapers, and catalogs. People also used old paper bags,
envelopes, and other bits of scrap paper, which were cut into
pieces and threaded onto a string that was kept in the privy.
Toilet paper is a fairly modern
invention, making its debut around 1880 when it was developed
by the British Perforated Paper Company. Made of a coarser
paper than its modern incarnation, it was sold in boxes of
individual squares. In America, the Scott Paper Company made
its Waldorf brand toilet paper in rolls as early as 1890. The
first rolls were not perforated, and lavatory dispensers had
serrated teeth to cut the paper as needed. It was a nearly
"unmentionable" product for years, and consumers were often
embarrassed to ask for it by name or even be seen buying it.
Timid shoppers simply asked for "Two, please," and the clerk
presumably knew what they wanted. To keep things discreet,
toilet paper was packaged and sold in brown paper wrappers.
During the 120 years since its
introduction, toilet paper has changed little, although it's
now perforated, and may be scented, embossed, or colored.
Recently, toilet paper manufacturers increased the number of
sheets on a roll, allowing consumers to replace the roll less
frequently.
|
