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Shipwrecked Man and Woman on Deserted Island

>> A retired corporate executive, now a widower, decided to take a
>> vacation.  He booked himself on a Caribbean cruise and proceeded to have
>> the time of his life, that is, until the ship sank.
>> He found himself on an island with no other people, no supplies,
>> nothing, only bananas and coconuts.
>> After about four months, he is lying on the beach one day when the most
>> gorgeous woman he has ever seen rows up to the shore.
>> In disbelief, he asks, "Where did you come from?  How did you get here?"
>> She replies, "I rowed from the other side of the island.  I landed here
>> when my cruise ship sank."
>> "Amazing," he notes.  "You were really lucky to have a row boat wash up
>> with you."
>> "Oh, this thing?" explains the woman.  "I made the boat out of raw
>> material I found on the island. The oars were whittled from gum tree
>> branches. I wove the bottom from palm branches, and the sides and stern
>> came from a Eucalyptus tree."
>> "But, where did you get the tools?"
>> "Oh, that was no problem," replied the woman.  "On the south side of the
>> island, a very unusual stratum of alluvial rock is exposed. I found if I
>> fired it to a certain temperature in my kiln, it melted into ductile
>> iron.  I used that for tools and used the tools to make the hardware."
>> The guy is stunned.
>> "Let's row over to my place," she says.
>> After a few minutes of rowing, she docks the boat at a small wharf.
>> As the man looks to shore, he nearly falls off the boat.  Before him is
>> a stone walk leading to an exquisite bungalow painted in red and white.
>> While the woman ties up the rowboat with an expertly woven hemp rope,
>> the man can only stare ahead, dumb struck.  As they walk into the house,
>> she says casually, "It's not much, but I call it home. Sit down, please.
>> Would you like a drink?"
>> "No!  No thank you," he blurts out, still dazed. "I can't take another
>> drop of coconut juice."
>> "It's not coconut juice", winks the woman.  "I have a still. How would
>> you like a Pina Colada?"
>> Trying to hide his continued amazement, the man accepts, and they sit
>> down on her couch to talk.
>> After they have exchanged their stories, the woman announces, "I'm going
>> to slip into something more comfortable.  Would you like to take a
>> shower and shave?   There is a razor upstairs in the bathroom cabinet."
>> No longer questioning anything, the man goes into the bathroom.  There,
>> in the cabinet, a razor made from a piece of tortoise bone. Two shells
>> honed to a hollow ground edge are fastened on to its end inside a swivel
>> mechanism. "This woman is amazing," he muses. "What next?"  When he
>> returns, she greets him wearing nothing but vines, strategically
>> positioned, and smelling faintly of gardenias. She beckons for him to
>> sit down next to her.
>> "Tell me", she begins suggestively, slithering closer to him, "We've
>> been out here for many months.  You've been lonely. There's something
>> I'm sure you really feel like doing right now, something you've been
>> longing for?" She stares into his eyes.
>> He cannot believe what he is hearing.  "You mean . . ." he swallows
>> excitedly and tears start to form in his eyes.
>> "Don't tell me you've built a Golf Course!"

      submitted by DT


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