Suddenly Alone

When a spouse dies—whether the death was expected or unexpected, you find yourself suddenly alone. The person with whom you have shared so many years is gone. What next?

It is best not to make hasty decisions. Give yourself time to think things through before making major changes. Consider the following:

Do not move from your present location, even to live with your children. Give yourself about six months to sort out your options.

Delay giving away personal items which you may regret doing within a few months.

Find a friend who will listen. If you feel uncomfortable talking to a friend, you can always talk to God. He listens.

Stay busy. This is especially helpful if you have been the constant caregiver.

Study your finances but try to avoid major changes in investments, etc., until you understand your options.

If you have been a "couple" for many years, you may feel awkward as a "single." Find other singles with whom you can socialize.

It is okay to cry. In the quiet of the night, you may feel extreme loneliness. It is okay to release this feeling through tears.

Time is a healer. Reflect on the pleasant memories of your life together. Enjoy and be thankful for the memories.

With God's help and the help of family and friends, you can pick up the pieces and build a meaningful life in the future. Christians have the blessed hope of seeing their loved ones again. Remember, if you are a Christian, you are never totally alone!